I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
