dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I'm at about main and main street
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
