I just saw a hot homeless man
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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