best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize