I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
