you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
handjob tips. give me some.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
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