Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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