it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
