Buhtt sex?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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