you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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