Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize