There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
