is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
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