She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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