do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
