The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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