But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
