I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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