Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
