Christians are straight up FREAKS
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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