I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
