are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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