this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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