office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
