My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
