before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
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