You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
