Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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