What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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