Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
