so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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