now i know why i became what i already was.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
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