What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize