Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i barfeds in our rink
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
