I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
