i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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