I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
