Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
