My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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