the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize