I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize