I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
