another moral hangover. fuck.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
