Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
