just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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