dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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