I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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