She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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