Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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