And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize