Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Randomize
